Tuesdays with Morrie：读后感（二）

Chapter 9: The Second Tuesday: We Talked About Feeling Sorry For Yourself

...Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them too, even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling.

记得我曾经和Shijie讨论过关于信任的问题，
而她当时的回答如下：
“I dunno lei I think for mi is extremely difficult to trust as well dun really think able to fully trust anyone but dun expect anyone to fully trust mi either”
其实我和Shijie一样，很难完全相信一个人。
但是有一点我是绝对相信的。
那就是Shijie不管做什么，
都决不会有伤害我的意思。

Chapter 11: The Audiovisual, Part Two

Ted, we've had thirty-five years of friendship. You don't need speech or hearing to feel that.

我一向来就很珍惜自己和交心的朋友之间时而发生的无言默契。
当然不是完全的无言，
但我不需要明讲，对方就能明白我想表达什么，
而我也能在字里行间或言语之间参透对方的想法和感觉。
但是，这种微妙的默契，
却不局限于交往多年的好友。
就像我和我那位才认识刚过一个星期的好朋友之间，
也一样存在着这种微妙的无言默契。

Chapter 14: The Fifth Tuesday: We Talk About Family

The fact is, there is no foundation, no secure ground, upon which people may stand today if it isn't the family.

此时的我对这句话有深刻的体会。
即将暂时与母亲和弟弟分开住的我，
已经感觉到一个不完整的家庭，
感觉是多么的失落，迷惘，
仿佛失去重心一样的不安。
而Shijie也曾告诉我要珍惜自己的家人，
这句话我一直没忘记。

Chapter 15: The Sixth Tuesday: We Talk About Emotions

Detachment doesn't mean you don't let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That's how you are able to leave it...by throwing yourself into these emotions...you experience them fully and completely. You know what pain is. You know what love is. You know what grief is.And only then can you say,'All right. I have experienced that emotion. I recognize that emotion. Now I need to detach from that emotion for a moment.

这一段，根据我自己的解读，
谈的是情感的抽离。
而要能够抽离，
首先需要充分体会想抽离的情绪，
并认识，熟悉它之后，
才能办得到。
我个人有小小的体会，
因为我就是这样学习面对寂寞的，
尤其是在找不到情感上的依靠时。

I thought about how often this (detachment) was needed in everyday life. How we feel lonely, sometimes to the point of tears, but we don't let those tears come because we are not supposed to cry. Or how we feel a surge of love for a partner but we don't say anything because we 're frozen with the fear of what those words might do to the relationship.

对这段话也是感同身受。
因思念和寂寞折磨到想落泪，
或是想打个电话，传个简讯给某人，
却怕对方感到厌烦而作罢。
其实适度的表达自己的情感是很重要的，
但在现代社会却往往会变成是一种示弱，
仿佛层层地武装自己才是生存之道。
因内疚而说对不起，
因喜欢而说喜欢你，
因思念而说我想你
因为爱而说我爱你，
其实真的没那么难的。

Chapter 17: The Seventh Tuesday: We Talk About The Fear Of Aging

But envy comes to me, I feel it, and then I let it go. Remember what I said about detachment? Let it go. Tell yourself,'That's envy, I'm going to separate from it now.' And walk away.

这一段很清楚地表达抽离的运用及重要性。
坦白说，我算是满勇于表达自己的情绪，
但却还没学会抽离及放手。
我是个很执著的人，
总希望能抓住些什么。
或许正因如此，我才无法感觉到解脱的轻松。
天性使然，也只能顺其自然了。